Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Stickers are beautiful.

"For he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name."
Luke 1:49; Mike Crawford and the Secret Siblings

Leaps and bounds, every morning I coax myself out of bed and head towards the kitchen for tea. I have mastered what I call "the leap" since there is one spot right by the front door that I must pass on my trek; it is where all stickers that our shoes so naively attract gather. If I have any desire to avoid a morning jolt of prickly pain, I crouch slightly, grip the couch and launch my body over the treacherous terrain.

Yet there are times that no matter how skilled I am at leaping, I still manage to secure a nice prick in the soft skin of my foot.

Today I was walking to my yoga class in sandals, treading cautiously and giving all sticker patches as wide a birth as possible. With my concentration so heavily on the ground, I was surprised by a spontaneous appreciation for the beauty of a plant that could be so annoying. I observed the unintentional patterns of the burrs and their flow with each other.

Stickers are Beautiful, Patience is not. It would be much less of an effort for me to just walk through that death trap and take the consequences of pain as it comes. So what happens when I quit jumping and I go one day, two days, and three without even a tiny prick? This just reinforces laziness and a desire for what I want.

Patience means i'm cautious, it means I leap over the apparent beauty to make it to something much more satisfying.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

No "fleeing" allowed

Two weeks to the end.
The definition of "FLEE" –verb (used without object)
1. take flight.
2. to move swiftly; fly; speed.

In fifth grade I got a ribbon for the long jump. I honestly cannot remember if it was one of those participation prizes or an actual award. Either way, I was satisfied. Long jump is one thing I have mastered, stand back...kick off...push and tuck...land.

Here I am some odd ten years later and am living out a long jump. However, I have forgotten to hold or wait for a result, I just keep on going full throttle until I am sucking back tears of exhaustion.

Thus I have begun the semester, maybe I hit a little too hard, maybe I thought myself a little too capable. Either way, humility strikes my face like I talked back to it for far to long.

I am on the last stick of proverbial gum in this surrender, and am curious to discover what my differences are? Where have I attempted growth?

The word flee sticks heavily in me mind.
To take flight...I can watch my own lack of satisfaction with the present; my feet are stuck in gritty mud and every pull against my current circumstances prove fruitless. I cannot flee from life, cannot take flight because that isn't why I was created. So, one muddy foot at a time, I can only hope to trudge forward.

Speed...can this ever be wise? I am designed, created, molded to enjoy a minute by minute exploit of life. Today is my adventure...cliché enough?

I will not flee.

Habakkuk 3:16
"I hear and my body trembles; my lips quiver at the sound; rottenness enters my bones; my legs tremble beneath me. Yet I will quietly wait..."

Extra thought:
I spent a month in the Dallas area, and met an aray of colorful people who reminded me of my arrogance and a life that overflows with provision. Two weeks I worked along side a group of individuals that I might avoid in a grocery store or crowded city corner. But I learned that an education at a University is no nobler than a single mother working her ass off to pay one rent check.